Hits – What do people expect from me ?

Prompted by Kelly’s list of search engine hits on her blog I thought I’d have a look at my own and see what inspires people to visit the old Honorarynewfie.
The all-time record goes to “who said honesty is the best policy”, but here’s a selection of the finest of the others and, me being me of course, I can’t let them pass without a little tongue-in-cheek comment.

some dislikes – and you ended up on my blog…. thanks, all 3 of you !
some dislikes. – You can’t fool me… that’s you again, isn’t it ? I recognise the style
some of sacagawea’s dislikes – Dunno… go ask sacagawea
communist velociraptor – politics must be older than I thought…
velociraptor on bicycle – … and bicycles
sleep weasels – or there’ll be no toast for breakfast (anagram of stoat, get it?)
not environmentally frinedly – nor particularly good at spelling, but I like you
name two things you would have to interpret – easy, Spanish and French. Next !
disadvantages of traffic jam– don’t you know already ?!
what does bicycle mean in china – Um… don’t tell me, it’s on the tip of my tongue… I know it… I know it…
how many cyclists in china – This is Honorarynewfie, not Wikipedia
old englishman – Guilty as charged, M’lud
us travel assenvironment – strangely enough “assenvironment” was going to be the subject of my next post
abba dont remember – it’s their age, bless
“delicate bits” – you came here for that ?! No, I can recommend a much better site….
who said honesty is the best police – I don’t know, but it was a cop out
grems-2010@hotmail.com – How on earth did that point at this blog ???
zombie bicycle – Imagery… a modern remake of Thriller with everybody on BMX’s, and you know that bit where they all jump up at once ?… go for it !
farmeromer – farm aroma… love it ! Haha !
on farmerama how do you go to night time? – you just look up from your computer and find it’s there already !
congratulation on japan earthquake – Thank you, but in fairness I can’t take all the credit
old english man – is that the guy with the sheepdog ?
could you survive an intense love making session with a dog – No ex-wife jokes allowed
farmerama bald eagle – :O Hell’s teeth, what level do you have to reach to get that ???
i’m sorry i haven’t a clue sean connery – That’sh perfectly all right, shome would shay
φαρμεραμα blog – It’s all Greek to me
astronomy – I hope my humble little blog was able to answer all your questions, but if there’s anything you’d like me just to go over again for you…
eaten by a bear – and still Googling ? There’s nothing some people can’t do !
the world greatest eagles vs sheep – Big ones; very big I would think
abomination – I love your blog too

and there’s a plethora of hamster-related material…

golf hamsters – I swear I’ve never made that connection
hamster tyre – would be as a spare for on the “golf” ?
the biggest hamster sheep in the world – hamster sheep ?! I’m not having that running around in a ball all night in my living room !
would a hamster run at night or day – Yes
amanda the hamster – No, Amanda the wife. Pay attention, there will be a test later.
how fast are hamsters? – I’m sorry, because of falling educational standards these days it has to be multiple choice… at least a) very, b) not very
ow many miles do hamsters run in a day? – shouldn’t that be “amsters” ?
how far do wild hamsters go every night – all the way, mate, all the way !
how many times does a hamster run on its wheel over a 10 hour period? – Why, specifically, 10 hours ? I’ll tell you 24 hours, you do the maths. (Lazy sod !)
how far does my hamster run – how should I know, it’s your hamster
what do hamsters do at night – Ooo… hamster-type things, you know…
how do hamsters know day and night – One is dark….
how long should hamsters run – Until their little legs ache, then they should unwind with a hot shower, a rub down and some sunflower seeds
how far does an average hamster run – an average distance… Doh !
tapewarm in hamster – So that’s how to get that tape warm. Thanks. Here Hammy !…
how long can hamsters travel – until their passports run out
do hamsters far? – Now that could be one of two questions….

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4 Responses to “Hits – What do people expect from me ?”

  1. Kikipotamus the Hobo Says:

    OMG, Tom, I can’t remember when I’ve laughed this hard. Two thirds of the way through the post I had to toss the laptop aside and race to the john before I peed all over the sofa.

    • honorarynewfie Says:

      Glad it gave you a laugh, Kelly. 🙂
      Thanks for the inspiration.

  2. Kikipotamus the Hobo Says:

    Oh, and by the way, the Greek one also says “Farmerama.” The one that made me laugh the hardest was the one about the bald eagle.

    • honorarynewfie Says:

      Yes, I could actually tell just by the look of it even though I can’t “read” it properly. I can recite the Greek alphabet as far as Rho even though I can’t necessarily relate all the characters to the sounds. Sometimes that even comes in useful…
      Interesting that the Bald Eagle was the one that got to you the most, I wonder which one’s other people would pick.


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