Not a massive response to my little quiz. Unfortunately I know of some people who saw it but were too scared to have a go. They will be spoken to….
Anyway, the answers are:
1. Amanda is my third wife. This is true, although I am hardly one to give up on things easily. I was first married in 1973 and very quickly the fruit of my loins, Tara, came along. Divorced after 13 years I then married again in 1986, surviving 8 years. (I’m pleased to say that Tara is in closer contact with my second wife than she is with her own mother.) I then entered into a 12 year relationship a woman who turned out to be a mad as a box of frogs, and I only just escaped with any sanity left, and very little self-esteem. I met Amanda on the internet at the start of 2008 and we were married in Nanning in January of this year. Third time lucky… very lucky !
2. I was once about 3 metres from Elton John as he was being rushed out of Gatwick airport by his entourage. This is true. I was there waiting to meet a friend who was due to arrive and you know how it is, there are always some people waiting to greet passengers who stand right in the middle and block the exit lane. I became aware that a tight group of people were trying to squeeze their way out and as I looked to my left to see what was going on realised that “tight group” consisted of Elton John, a large pile of suitcases, and a group of minders who were surrounding him and ushering people out of the way. Good old “Reg”, being vertically challenged as he is, couldn’t actually see past the suitcases and just had to trust that the gang were pushing him in the right direction. I also brushed past Ruud Gullit (one of the world’s greatest soccer players) at Schiphol Airport in Amsterdam when he was flying out to start his playing career with Milan. Have always wished I’d reacted quick enough to wish him luck. Great player.
3. I used to show Dobermann’s at dog shows. This is true. I have travelled the length and breadth of Britain going to dog shows with the mad woman and the gorgeous Dobes and, on occasions, actually used to handle the dogs in the ring. Notice I didn’t use the word “successfully” there…..
4. Tinnitus is a curse, and I should know ! You bet your sweet ass ! There is no such thing as silence any more. It’s been coming on for over ten years now and I think I’ve identified thirteen slightly different, concurrent pitches to it so far…. and counting….
5. The toe next to the big toe on my right foot points downwards. This is true. The end knuckle, if that what it’s called when talking about toes, is permanently bent so the end part and the nail point downwards. My oldest friend from way back in my school days had exactly the same thing, with exactly the same toe. Apparently it’s not that uncommon.
6. Playing darts, I have hit “180″ on three different boards in three different pubs in the same evening. This is true. I used to play in pub dart teams up to five nights a week and even made Super League for a while. One evening I went down the Star for a bit of early practice by myself and hit 180, went up the Rose and Crown for a match and hit 180, then back to my local (the Black Horse) and hit 180. I have played for teams at all those, and some other, pubs in Thetford during my time there.
7. My Dad and I both owned Volkwagen Beetles at the same time. Sad, but true. For Dad it was the only car he ever bought brand new. His was already about 12 years old when I got mine, a used semi-automatic version. I still think they looked cool sat on the drive together.
8. I have five grandchildren. This is false. Ok, Kelly, you got me ! It’s only four (I hope). The eldest is now at college while the youngest is about 3, I think. (I’ve always been terrible about their ages. ). So that is definitely enough… isn’t it Tara ?!
9. I once wrote a piece of software to update an IBM package because IBM didn’t know how to fix the problem. This is true. Back in the good old days of the System/34 the engineering company that I worked for as a programmer wanted to run multiple versions of IBM’s MAAPICS package independently on the same machine. “Oh, sure !” said IBM, and promptly send us two floppy disks which they said would set it up for us, but which gloriously failed to do anything of the sort. When IBM finally admitted they didn’t think it could be done I was given the job of making sure it would be done, and five months later our company was selling the software I had written to other companies, getting our sales leads from… IBM.
10. I flew to Copenhagen, Denmark on Concorde the first time Concorde ever went there, and had won the ticket in a raffle. This is true. My first wife and I had gone into a shop in town to hire a carpet shampooing machine and on the counter were some charity raffle tickets for sale, for which the prize was flights for two on Concorde. Handing over my 50p I filled in our details on the stub and took the ticket, noticing at the time that the ticket number (B2212) offered numerous mathematical possibilities for playing around with my lucky number 3. “That has to be lucky”, I thought… and it was. Not only that, but the person who was sponsoring the prize for the charity told the organisers that if the winners were available, with passports, the Saturday after the draw was done then he would pay the extra for us to go on that inaugural flight to Copenhagen. You have never seen two people get passports so quickly and, for her, it was the first time she had ever flown !
So there it is… Potted Tom, version 1. Well done Kelly.
I’m already working on ideas for the next one when, hopefully, more people will be prepared to have a go. But that will have to wait until the new year as later on today I’m off to China to be with Amanda for a few weeks so I’ll be out of circulation as far as WordPress is concerned.
Have yourselves a Merry Little Christmas and a Happy New Year, but most importantly…. stay safe !